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Marvin Lewis is Back; Carson Palmer Won’t Be

Mitch Stringer-USA TODAY Sports

As far as Nostradamus-like predictions in 2018, I’m two-for-two. Not even 24 hours after I predicted that Marvin Lewis would return to the Cincinnati Bengals on a two-year contract and that Carson Palmer would retire from the NFL, both happened in a span of maybe 30 minutes. I’d pat myself on the back, but I need both hands to write this up.

MARVIN LEWIS AND BENGALS CONSCIOUSLY RE-COUPLE

An opportunity was there for what could turn out to be an organizational resurgence. A change that could impact the Cincinnati Bengals for the next decade. This is a team with a ton of talent on both sides of the ball, elite players like A.J. Green and Geno Atkins. Up and coming stars like Dre Kirkpatrick and Joe Mixon. All they needed was to bring in the right guy. The Philadelphia Eagles did it with Doug Pederson. The Los Angeles Rams did it with Sean McVay. The Bengals now had their chance to re-write their story.

And they completely blew it.

There’s a reason Bengals owner Mike Brown is the laughingstock of the league and he showed it once again, signing Marvin Lewis to a new, two-year contract that will keep him in Cincinnati, and the Bengals in mediocrity, through 2019.

So how did this happen? Well, Lewis leading the Bengals over his old team, the Baltimore Ravens 31-27, on the final day of the regular season certainly helped. In fact, Lewis and the Bengals knocked the Detroit Lions out of the NFC playoff hunt with a 26-17 victory the week before.

That worked in Lewis’ favor. Anything else? Personally, I think the Washington Redskins deciding to keep Jay Gruden as their head coach had a lot to do with this decision. It was no secret Cincinnati was paying close attention to Washington’s situation. Hell, the fact that Gruden would have been snatched up so quickly might have prompted the Redskins and owner Dan Snyder to give him another chance.

What worked against Lewis? How about the fact that his contract was up and the Bengals could just push him off into the ocean and send flaming arrows at his boat like a Viking funeral? There would be no payout. No controversy. No official firing. Lewis would just walk away and not be asked back. It would be difficult to ask for an easier situation. It’s one that teams like the Rams and Lions had with their shitty head coaches that they completely screwed up by signing secret (and not-so-secret) extensions in that final contract season.

What else? How about the very definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. When Lewis took over the Bengals back in 2003 the team had five playoff victories in their entire history. After Lewis’ 14 years with Cincinnati and seven trips to the postseason, the Bengals still have five franchise playoff victories.

Lewis is 0-7 in the postseason and that final playoff loss in 2015, an 18-16 complete team-wide meltdown against the Pittsburgh Steelers at home, was the most egregious. After that, Lewis really lost the team and it’s showed on the field. After five consecutive winning and playoff seasons, the Bengals have lost nine games two years in a row.

Are the Bengals really stuck with Lewis two more years? If it was any other team, you’d say no. The fact is, Mike Brown is the second worst owner in the NFL and one of the five worst owners in professional sports. He also serves as his own general manager, which makes him the worst GM in the league. Luckily, at least, he’s let Lewis call the personnel shots and Marvin has actually done pretty well in that role. Hell, Lewis wanted to retire and go be a GM and nobody bit.

Three things could happen next season with Lewis and the Bengals. The least likely is that they have a successful season and all is right with the world, regardless of what happens in the playoffs. The most likely is that whatever head coach Brown would rather have (Gruden or the Browns’ Hue Jackson) gets fired by their current team and Brown, in turn, shitcans Lewis. The third option, and maybe the best for the Bengals, would be Brown stepping away from the GM role, moving Lewis to that job from head coach and then let Marvin pick his own head coach. Which would probably still be Jackson or Gruden. We’ll see.

CARSON PALMER HANGS UP HIS GUNBELT

Monday, when Arizona Cardinals head coach Bruce Arians announced his retirement, I wrote that Carson Palmer would probably follow him. It didn’t even take a full day for that to happen.

Tuesday, Palmer made it official and walked away from the NFL at 38 after 14 seasons, his last five with the Cardinals.

“Over the years, I’ve had teammates who decided to hang it up and I would ask them how they knew it was time to walk away,” Palmer said in a statement. “The answer was almost always the same: You just know. For me that time is now. Why? Quite simply, I just know.”

Palmer wraps up his career with 6,307 completions, a 62.5 completion percentage, 46,247 passing yards, 294 touchdowns and 187 interceptions. His career record is 93-91-1 with a 1-3 record in the playoffs.

“In the end, it’s not what happens on the football field that sticks with you,” Palmer said. “Those are details that I know fade with time. Now it’s time for something else and I’m excited to find out exactly what that will be. I know for sure it will center around the five most important people in my life,my wife Shae and our four awesome kids. They have sacrificed so much to let me pursue my football goals. Now it’s their turn. We can only hope that the next chapters are as rewarding and provide as much joy as the last 15 years in the NFL have.”

Palmer was the No. 1 pick by the Cincinnati Bengals in the 2003 NFL Draft. He played there for seven seasons before “retiring” the first time. He ended up with the Oakland Raiders for two years, then had the best years of his career with Arizona from 2013-2017.

And, before anyone wants to start throwing around dumb ideas, no, he’s not a Hall of Famer. He was good, a legit NFL starter for his entire career. He doesn’t deserve a bust in the big house.

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Written by Adam Greene

Adam Greene is a writer and photographer based out of East Tennessee. His work has appeared on Cracked.com, in USA Today, the Associated Press, the Chicago Cubs Vineline Magazine, AskMen.com and many other publications.

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