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Friday Afternoon Quarterback: NFL Week 7 Spread Picks and Locks

Jake Roth-USA TODAY Sports

I had a good feeling about picking the Arizona Cardinals coming into Thursday night’s game. David Johnson was due for a breakout rushing performance and the Denver Broncos looked like they might be ready to hit the sim button to the offseason.  After nailing last Thursday’s final score to the decimal, I have to admit getting a little cocky here at the Friday Afternoon Quarterback in Week 7.

Six minutes into the game, that good feeling was all gone. Look how I put the word “upset” in quotes, signifying that it shouldn’t actually be considered a surprise if Arizona won. I mean, 24 points for the Cardinals? Thursday night Josh Rosen was way likelier to throw 24 interceptions.

I have plenty of ground to make up. Here’s your Friday Afternoon Quarterback:

Byes: Green Bay Packers, Oakland Raiders, Pittsburgh Steelers and Seattle Seahawks

Sunday 

Tennessee Titans vs Los Angeles Chargers (-6.5, O/U: 45.5) in London

The good news for the Titans is Joey Bosa is still injured. The bad news is they’ll still give up 15 sacks. Chargers 23, Titans 17

Related: NFL Betting Guide | Week 7 Odds

New England Patriots at Chicago Bears (+2.5, O/U: 48.5)

I don’t care if the Bears are even in this game in the fourth quarter. I want to see Tom Brady’s face when Khalil Mack is cuddling him up for sleepy time. Patriots 27, Bears 24

Cleveland Browns at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-4, O/U: 50.5)

The Fitzmagic is long gone, and for some reason Winstonsanity hasn’t become a thing. It’s more like Winstonshruggery. Browns 23, Buccaneers 20

Detroit Lions at Miami Dolphins (+3, O/U: 46.5)

The stage is set for another classic Matthew Stafford vs. Brock Osweiler quarterback duel. Dolphins 20, Lions 17

Carolina Panthers at Philadelphia Eagles (-4, O/U: 45.5)

Here’s what makes me nervous about this pick. The Panthers are a good team vying for a playoff spot and are coming off a loss. In fact, they’re 0-2 on the road. You’d think that’d make the Eagles an easy pick, but if you do, you don’t understand the weird mojo undercurrent in these kinds of games. Still, I’m rolling with it. Eagles 27, Panthers 24

Buffalo Bills at Indianapolis Colts (-7.5, O/U: 43)

Here’s a little more NFL mojo for you. The Bills are the worst team in football, yet they’ve won two of their last four and beat the spread in three of their last four. Does that mean Buffalo is going to win? Nope. Colts 23, Bills 20 

Minnesota Vikings at New York Jets (+3.5, O/U: 46)

Last week after scoring a touchdown, Kirk Cousins did this dance.

Cousins is the kind of guy that’d use a christian rock song as his walk-up music. Vikings 34, Jets 17

Houston Texans at Jacksonville Jaguars (-5, O/U: 41.5)

The Jaguars have lost two games in a row and everyone is already writing them off, so this is the perfect time for “Good Blake Bortles” to show back up and make everybody stupid again. Jason Mendoza wept! Jaguars 30, Texans 17

New Orleans Saints at Baltimore Ravens (-2.5, O/U: 49)

I have yet to figure out the Ravens. So, much like George Costanza in The Opposite episode of Seinfeld, I’ve decided to reject every instinct I have when it comes to Baltimore. I’m not kidding. Ravens 34, Saints 20

Dallas Cowboys at Washington Redskins (-1, O/U: 41.5)

There’s a rumor in the wind that the Cowboys are planning to give Jason Garrett an extension and fans are rightly a little outraged. I say, let it play out Dallas fans. The last time a coach that should have been fired got an undeserved extension, he was followed by one of the best young coaches in the game.

Remember, there’s always hope and it’s not your money getting tossed down the toilet. Cowboys 20, Redskins 17

Los Angeles Rams at San Francisco 49ers (+9.5, O/U: 52)

This is the third straight touchdown-plus road-spread for the Rams and it’ll be the third straight game they don’t cover. Rams 33, 49ers 24

Cincinnati Bengals at Kansas City Chiefs (-5.5, O/U: 57.5)

That was a tough loss last Sunday against the Steelers, Bengals, but I have a feeling you’ll wish you were reliving it Sunday night when the Chiefs hang 40 on you. Chiefs 44, Bengals 34

Monday Night

New York Giants at Atlanta Falcons (-4.5, O/U: 53.5)   

ESPN can’t flex out of this game, but I have a feeling plenty of viewers will. Falcons 27, Giants 20           

This week

Straight up: 0-1

Against the spread: 0-1

Last week

Straight up: 8-7

Against the spread: 7-8

Season

Straight up: 49-42-2

Against the spread: 43-50

Written by Adam Greene

Adam Greene is a writer and photographer based out of East Tennessee. His work has appeared on Cracked.com, in USA Today, the Associated Press, the Chicago Cubs Vineline Magazine, AskMen.com and many other publications.

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