After reports surfaced that he was facing a 10-game suspension for failing another PED test, Philadelphia Eagles right tackle Lane Johnson has implemented the seldom used Maura Move and just decided he isn’t suspended at all.
What is the “Maura move?” Here. Watch it in action.
Maura was one of the many nightmare relationships that George Constanza inflicted upon himself during the sitcom Seinfeld’s nine-year run. She got her hooks into George in the final season so in the Seinfeld Universe (or Seinverse), they could and probably are still together today.
Lane Johnson has obviously just now reached this episode on his Netflix queue.
The news broke this morning that the Eagles were facing a lengthy time without Johnson and it was confirmed on the NFL Network and on the NFL’s own website.
I have been told Lane Johnson will be suspended 10 games for PED violation. His 2nd offense. #Eagles
— Darren DeGaetano (@DarrenDegaetano) August 9, 2016
It was devastating news to the Eagles and to Johnson, or it should have been if he accepted that it was happening. According to Johnson, he’s not been suspended and everything is awesome.
Welp, texting with Lane Johnson, who just said he was asleep and "nothing is going on." I am puzzled.
— Les Bowen (@LesBowen) August 9, 2016
Puzzled, Les Bowen says. How about Jeff McLane?
Lane Johnson just responded to text message and said that "all was good," and denied report he's been suspended for 10 games for PED use.
— Jeff McLane (@Jeff_McLane) August 9, 2016
Surely there’s some wires crossed here or some sort of miscommunication, you might think? Let’s check with Johnson’s agent, Ken Sarnoff. Here’s what he said in a statement.
“1. We are aware that a member of the media has started a rumor that Lane will be suspended for a PED violation.” Sarnoff said in the statement..” 2. Lane has not been suspended and any report to the contrary is false. 3. Nonetheless, we will not comment on my client’s protected health information.”
After that statement was released, Johnson then immediately began commenting on his protected health information. It turns out that Johnson took an “approved amino acid” that he thinks may have caused a positive test. Why would an approved supplement cause a positive PED hit? Well, that’s for Johnson to know and the rest of us to find out, apparently.
The NFL has let players off the hook on PED hits if they can prove they didn’t willingly ingest the substance. Houston Texans offensive tackle Duane Brown had his ban overturned from a positive test stemming from eating Mexican beef. But he was still banned, at least for a while.
Johnson doesn’t seem to think that’s how this all works. He thinks the Maura move is all but unbeatable and history shows he may be right.
Johnson is a former first round draft pick and has started 44 consecutive games for the Eagles. Over the offseason he signed a five-year, $56.26 million contract extension with a $10 million signing bonus and $35.5 million in guaranteed money. Guaranteed money that will disappear if Johnson’s implementation of the Maura Move doesn’t work.
Worth noting re: Lane Johnson, per his contract, a suspension would void the guaranteed money in the 5-year extension he signed in January.
— Field Yates (@FieldYates) August 9, 2016
More Training Camp injuries
Tuesday the Indianapolis Colts lost starting defensive tackle Kendall Langford for at least a month after he had his knee scoped. If the procedure went normally, and there’s no indication it didn’t, Langford should be ready for the regular season. Last year Langford had 38 tackles, seven sacks and three passes defended.
The New England Patriots may be without their best pass rusher for a couple of months. Outside linebacker/Defensive end Ron Ninkovich tore his tricep Tuesday during a joint practice with the New Orleans Saints. The good news for Ninkovich and the Pats is that he didn’t tear his tricep ligament, so he could return sometime in October. Ninkovich had 52 tackles, 6.5 sacks, one fumble recovery, one forced fumble and seven pass defenses last season for the Patriots. Losing Ninkovich is a blow since New England traded away Chandler Jones. Ninkovich is an important team leader too. The 11-year veteran had started 102 straight games.
Ninkovich wasn’t the only Patriots player to go down Tuesday. Wide receiver and Tom Brady’s No. 1 stalker Julian Edelman left practice with a lower leg injury. Edelman had just gotten off the Physically Unable to Perform list after suffering a broken foot last November. Edelman played in nine games last year, catching 61 passes for 692 yards and seven touchdowns. Edelman is listed as day-to-day.
